Showing posts with label dreams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dreams. Show all posts

09 August 2018

Chronic Illness: Dreams and Depression

Happy Thursday my friends. Sometimes I find myself floundering these last 3 1/2 years. Come November it will be 4 years since I first got ill, first with tonsillitis and then chronic fatigue syndrome (later diagnosed as fibromyalgia). 
Since I cannot work nor finish my dissertation, at times I feel very depressed and lost. There were times when I felt especially lost because I could not drive myself outside and was reliant on medical transport to get to the doctor's office or friends to come visit me. Thankfully I have been able to move on from using medical transport and my wheelchair. I can even drive around town on a good day and sit through a theatrical performance. Yes I am usually incapacitated the day after but it's so important to feel some sense of freedom and enjoy opportunities for pleasure. And I don't even know what I would do without my beautiful dogs and family. Their love and support means so much and is able to bring a smile to my face even on the dreariest of days.
But what i meant to say before I got longwinded was that my therapist this week asked me why I could not start working on my dream. At first I thought it was laughable but heck, why not? I might not be as capable as when I was running around London and studying for my degree. But I do have a mind, sluggish as it might be, and so why not do some investigative work and poke around at fulfilling my dreams? Just because one is disabled and incapacitated in many aspects does not mean that I cannot dream and make the most of whatever this is.

Surely there is a purpose, yes?